I should know better than have meetings the week that income taxes are due. Either that or I should do my taxes earlier...

I actually felt my gyri (brain ridges) uncoiling like frayed bungee cords and unfurling like those noisemakers from a New Years party.

Oh well enough of my ranting, I think I should get a tattoo that says "Live to Whine / Whine to Live"

Ehkosit,
Migwec

The first week of Kids' soccer arrived, but it was looking like it would be snowed out up until the last second. The snow was gone, but the fields could still have been shut down because they were still wet. It has been a real climatological roller coaster here for the last few weeks - hopefully spring has sprung and we can put away the snowpants and winter coats for a while.

I sketched this picture from a game before my oldest son's match. I am still not comfortable drawing too publicly, but it was fun and I am goping to try to colour it in with photoshop and fool aropund with some of the filters and brushes - if I do I will put it up on the blog later.

I had to admit that the play-off beard was not turning out as expected (read: hoped for) and so I have shaved it. I didn't so much pull off 'Edgy Urban Artist' as 'Michael Moore Stunt Double."

Not only that but the Flames were knocked out of the playoffs in game 7. It was a good effort but they fell apart for a few minutes and found themselves in a hole they couldn't dig out of (this time). In a way I am glad to have my evenings back - there is a lot to do and it is really hard to work around the playoff schedule.

Ehkosit,

Migwec.

Sunday was a very busy (but also very good) day. We had a choir join us for our morning service - and they accounted for thirty-some people - a nice boost especially since the weather has been terrible lately. What is with snowstorms in April. There was a new family out (I still love that we are a small enough congregation to notice those things) and the message went well. Because I knew I was going to be tight for time I think I planned out my sermon more than I have in awhile (maybe I should get back to that).  I just find that when I do that I fall back into an intellectual discourse more than an applicable exposition... I need to find a middle ground between shooting from the hip and "academese."

The evening brought our second baptismal service of the year and potluck. I was thrilled as I got to baptise one guy that I drank tea with in China and he has since moved to Canada, a lady that grew up in a Ukrainian church in Toronto and has made her way back to that early faith via our congregation and then another person showed up with a bag packed for his baptism - he had started the journey in Venezuela at a baptist church there and now was ready to take the plunge here in Calgary. Each of their stories deeply moved me as we met together prior to their decisions to get baptized.

The potluck that followed was a great time of eating and laughing together. These are the times and places we build community that is more than just a buzzword. The awesome privilege of joining people in their baptism is what makes the slinging of chairs and hoisting of speakers worth it all.

I wish I could be more profound but a nagging back injury and standing in water that is best measured using the Kelvin Scale has left me a little off this morning - ah well its worth it.

Ehkosit,

Migwec

I am tranmogrifying into a big fuzzy egg!! For those that care, I have escaped yet another "went-way-to-far-for-a-few-cheap-laughs" adventure relatively unharmed. The dye came off of my face, but I am actually tender in spots because of the amount of scrubbing. BTW Juli if you are reading this blog, I had to borrow your new loofa, but I got most of the black off of it, honey.

Ehkosit,

Migwec

I woke up this morning and discovered my play-off beard had completely grown in!! This was easier than I thought it would be.

Epilogue (or epiblog I guess)

Literally five minutes after taking this picture I tried to wash the dye off (it wasn't really my beard sorry no miracle hair growth) and I couldn't. I think I have managed to get most of it off, but it is hard to tell because my skin is so red and discoloured from the scrubbing!!

I was just looking for another picture when I ran across this. It is a mock (but-not-mocking) Revival Poster I made for my brother-in-law. It is from a campfire last summer.

Sundays are a busy day - even with the shift to setting up on Saturdays we need to get to the school early and get ready for the Sunday service. We also have to tear down after the service. But our church day doesn't end there, Juli and I (and the kidlets), head downtown to help out at another Baptist Union church plant.

We always wanted to have a church support us in our beginning year but that was limited to be honest (and not dwell on a past issue) - so when we were taken up on the offer to help at Goodtree Christian Fellowship we dove in.

In the beginning Juli did the children's program and I assisted. Now there is a team of leaders from Goodtree to come alongside Juli and so I more often attend their worship service and only pitch in when somebody can't make it or Juli's pregnancy slows her down (she will hate that I wrote this but it is true - even she has a limit in the state she is in).

Anyhoo this week I toted my sketchbook in with me and doodled some pix. I paid attention, but their pastor had asked me to do up some pictures for them so I thought this would be the best way to build up some resources for the later work. This is just one of the pages.

Game 3

I warned you it wouldn't be a pretty voyage. There was a point in the first 5 minutes of the game that I thought I would just shave it off then.  What a horrible start - words describing the game as well as the beard.

It is kind of sad that to realize that I my beard is 50/50 grey and brown. I always hoped that by the time I left my teen years I would have mastered facial hair growth. Instead I am nearing the big 4-0 (in a few years) and I still endure pangs of jealousy when I am talking to people that have thick full beards. I went out for coffee with a guy the other night where I am sure I was able to watch his beard grow and fill in as we talked. My attempt looks like a poorly watered lawn in an arid climate - it is reminiscent of my back yard.

Ehkosit,

Migwec

Most often my doodles are the work of an acerbic pen dipped in a well of bitter ink. That is to say my first preference would be to give somebody a quick five in the snot box or tell em off (hey I grew up on a rez - that's the reaction that is really there - no amount of higher education is going to trump what you learn early in life) but in what passes for maturation I don't do it. The feeling doesn't completely go away so I need an outlet - sometimes I go to the gym, sometimes I take the dog for a walk, often I doodle.

Unfortunately this makes me look like a bit of a pyschopath with anger management issues to the occassional visitor of the blog. I have been trying to spend more time scanning pages from my sketchbook so that I can upload them and give a more balanced look at my doodlage. These are from the kids program we run on Wednesday nights...

Just fooling around with Comic Life for Mac... 

I remember reading about a bunch of people that were trapped on a rollercoaster for 30 minutes. Sometimes I feel like I've been on a rollercoaster since 2005 (when we started SouthGate Church). I sometimes wonder if I could get used to regular life again.

Ehkosit,

Migwec. 

There were no other kids at the Tuesday Morning Small Group, so Maggie and I just spent the time drawing and dancing and drawing about dancing. Here are some of the pix. The first is Maggie doing some intense (very thoughtful) ballet and then Maggie showed me how I dance and got me to draw that in the second doodle. I should note that there was a bit of artistic conflict as she wanted me to draw myself in a pink ballet outfit like she has - I didn't want to.


Ehkosit,
Migwec.

Day 1

Sorry to all the Oilers and Canucks fans, but the playoffs are starting and my Flames are in it!! I have decided to show my solidarity for the cause by joining the guys in pursuing the perfect playoff beard!!! I fall more into the Ovechkin camp than the Neidermeyer camp in the Chin Spaghetti all-stars.  I blame it on my Japanese and Chinese ancestry. I've  got limited math skills, I am a nightmare when it comes to fixing my computer but the stereotypical  feature I have grabbed a hold of is the inability to grow solid facial air (well that and I'm a pretty sketchy driver). Lock yourselves in and enjoy the ride. I probably will only check in on a weekly basis as I don't expect there to be too much action from the follicles so I hope the Flames make it deep into the playoffs.

Ehkosit,

Migwec.

PS whaadiya think of my Broke-Back inspired cowboy shirt I like it but Juli's not a big fan of it.

I found this doodle recently. It is from when Juli first met me (really re-met me but that's another story) back in 1992. I think I did so she could learn the names of the family pets.

They are...

Dogs: Mahkate, Copena, Tchaik and Amber
Cats: Mitty, Rawhide and Missy
Human: Jeff

(If you click on it you can get a bigger picture)

This is how I feel too many Monday mornings. Fixating on the few negatives rather than the numerous positives. We have had a number of people come forward about baptisms, there have been people that have committed (and others re-committing) their lives to follow Jesus - all markers of success in the 'church biz'. I have watched relationships heal and people walk through overwhelming challenges. There have been births and marriages. And in the middle of it all I get stuck on who left the service without talking, I think about the person who seems to be avoiding a coffee, and I analyse every comment to make sure I don't miss a veiled shot.

It amazes me because this is not who I was - but it sure is who I am. I am working on it though (I wouldn't have scanned this sketch if I was still feeling so insecure), but it's a work in progress. It took me 5 years become a person who is constantly listening for footsteps and it will take a while to get back to being myself again. Pray for me (seriously).

Ehkosit,
Migwec.

Today we are relaxing and doing th e Pysanky thing (Ukranian Easter Eggs). Combine permanent dyes, burning candles and hot wax to breakable eggs and a housefull of kids (we have some friends joining us in this first year of a new tradition). I even bought some pirohi - thats perogies for the non-Ukes (I qualify as an adopted son of Yorkton's Ukranian community).

On a side note, it was quite discomforting to see just how little photoshop manipulation it took to fit an egg image on top of my real head.

Ehkosit,
Migwec

Daddy's girl...

She's so much my girl that we are even watching Tipi Tales together!! I try to teach her a little Ojibwa as we watch - but I'm so rusty. BTW that's the language I sign off on - "Ehkosit" means "That's all to say for now" (sorta) and "Migwec" is "Thank You."

Ehkosit,

Migwec

( Micah and I exchanging slashes)

(Mason and I get ready for a face-off)

Here are some action photos of the day at Kids & Dads Hockey. In every photo I am hooking, tripping or somehow pestering my kids. My wife is not the cross-stitching type, but she has threatened to do a needle point of Ephesians 6:4 (the one about Fathers not provoking their children to wrath) to put up in our house.

Had a busy Easter Sunday. The service at SouthGate went well - we were missing a number of families to traveling, but there were a number of families growing in their consistency (not just in terms of Sunday attendance but in small groups, spontaneous fellowship and leadership engagement).

Right after the service we headed down to Good Tree Christian Fellowship where Juli has been working with their  children's ministry (she serves as the Sunday School Pastor) and I went to First Baptist Church to preach at the Spanish Congregation. Preaching with a translator takes some getting used to, but it went well. I do enjoy preaching in that sanctuary again.

I found out today that another couple is "attending elsewhere" - I realize it is part of the ministry, but I still take it personally when people decide to go to another church. I recognize that I should say, "As long as they are still a part of the body of Christ and worshipping with fellow believers that's great." In fact that is what I say, but deep down I have to admit a twinge of personal rejection. But we push on...

BTW if you get up close (and scratch the screen) you can smell the jersey I am wearing.

Ehkosit,

Migwec

Today was the last day of City Hockey for my boys (Mason & Micah) and the parents were scheduled to play against the kids. That was exciting. It was Mason's 9th birthday - that made it even more exciting. The only down side was I was on the run before the ice time (I was doing a guest lecture at Chinook College and then had additional pick ups after school) and I forgot to pack a jersey. or hoodie, or anything remotely athletic. It was going to be the "dress shirt and Helmet look" for me - incidentally collared shirts were one of the options for the NHL to go to this year but they decided to go with the RBK Edge models in a hotly contested decision.

In what turned out to be a really (really really) bad decision I grabbed a jersey out of the Lost & Found at the rink. Surprisingly the cast away shirt that had been marinading in the bin of long forgotten shirts, jerseys, water bottles and miscellaneous equipment was more than a little stinky. I should have realized it was bad when I heard one of the jock straps release a sigh of relief as I took the jersey out. I am sure that it had been used to scrub down the washrooms at the rink the last time dysentry had swept through a visiting team...wow it stunk and it was a size too small to boot.

The end result was that the kids won 14-3 and I think I've got a rash developing where the shirt came in contact with bare skin.

Next time I'm going with the dress shirt!

Ehkosit,
Migwec

While the boys are taking Spanish lessons - as a linguist I can't justify waiting until the school system starts teaching them languages so they are learning from a friend - I come down to the local coffee shop to respond to emails and do some planning.

We had a really good Palm Sunday service. I am sensing a real connect within our community. The younger set has really stepped up to the plate. It is nice to hear people talk about SouthGate as being "Our church" rather than "Your church" or "Jeff & Juli's church".  I understand where that comes from, but it is great to see ownership setting in. We are going through some gut checks as a church as we move forward. The realization that we are now responsible for meeting our budget is a challenge for a church of any age, but this is new for us and is taking some getting used to. We have slashed as much as we can - we were pretty frugal to begin with - and it is going to stretch us. The other realization is that we may need to look for more permanent digs - the cost of land and buildings is slowing down, but it is still going up in Calgary. In the last few weeks there have been some interesting prospects pop onto the radar screen and so we will gather some information and pray like crazy about it.

No matter what I will still be a regular at the Starbucks - its nice to get away and I tend to see different people that would never wander into a church office.

Ehkosit,

Migwec

One of the greatest sources of sanity - and greatest purveyors of insanity - over the last year has been my English Springer Spaniel. Bronte (my wife was an Lit Major) is full of boundless energy - and a similar amount of 'poopage.' Our backyard attests the truth of both of these statements.

We have worked hard to train her over the winter and she has made big strides - though she has her days. This summer we are determined to reclaim our yard and so she has a big dog run along the side of the house and when we re-do the fence she will receive a few upgrades in her accomodations.

As the weather has improved so has my desire to take her regular walks.

Ehkosit,

Migwec

Today is Palm Sunday. It kicks off the Holy Week celebrated by Christians. It all starts with the Triumphal Entry. I have never been to the Holy Land, I don't know what it is like to be park of the crowds that gather for the Passover Celebration.

The closest I can claim is that I have been part of the Pow Wow Grand Entry at the college I graduated from and taught at, the Saskatchewan Indian Federated College (now the First Nations University of Canada). One year I even entered with Allen Sapp (who painted the picture above). Being that I minored in Indian Art History in my first BA that was quite an honour.

I have been reading the the accounts of Jesus' last week in the various gospels. Considering this week accounts for the bulk of the book of John I think I will be putting recreational reading to the side for the remainder of the week.

When I do get back to it I am going to start up John Raston Saul's "The Unconscious Civilization" and I also have to pick out another classic - probably Austen's "Northanger Abbey" (Juli just finished it).

My reading has dropped off this fall and I feel a little mentally lethargic.

This Photo Booth feature is the best 'baby-sitting tool' ever invented since the TV!!! We can literally waste an entire morning making goofy pictures. Here are a few from this  morning's efforts.

Enjoying a big ol' bowl o' Pho. 

I am finishing up some notes for tonight's lecture. It always strikes me as funny that I teach the students (among other things) that they should limit their teaching to small amounts of 'TEACHER TALK' in a fifty minute period - but I do it in the context of a three and a half hour lecture!!

The new course I am starting focuses on Applied Linguistics - so it draws on my undergrad and grad work. I sometimes worry that I may try to push too much info into the time frame, but it has been a long time since I have had a chance to get into lexical decomposition, functional vs inflectional morphology and the like (it just doesn't come up in everyday conversation as much as you would expect or hope it to).

Is there a cool way to pull up your pants? Mine are usually riding too low for the comfort of the wearer or onlookers.  I have been trying to convince my wife that it is how all the kids are wearing their pants - she just reminds me I'm not a hip urban youth (in fact I can't claim any single descriptor let alone the combination of all three).  

But back to my problem. I possess a middle-aged gut that means I have to choose between 'the under sling' where I position my belt below the gut and cinch it tight making me look like one of those kids books where you mix-and-match the head, body and legs. The other choice is to do 'the over stuff' where I cram my girth into my waistline and my belt buckle is in danger of chafing my nipples!! The truth is that either solution is the gut equivilent of the 'comb-over.'

Always the moderate I try to keep my belt in the middle - but then I am forever having to hike my pants up. I am committed to avoiding the above mentioned solutions for as long as possible so please help me!! If you have a link to you-tube or a reference in a self help book please pass it along. I have looked through back issues of GQ and this is a thoroughly neglected topic.

I have watched as others clutch, twist and pull their pants up in a variety of techniques - each one less cool than the last. I have to admit I am looking at my wife's collection of maternity pants with envy that borders on covetousness. I'm pretty sure this breaks a number of the Vatican's definitions of sin - new and old.

Ehkosit,

Migwec

Here are some more pix from the Tuesday morning crew...

Just fooling around with some pictures of Maggie dancing...

I thought I would have bought an LP from a band called "the Dancing Maggies" back when I bought records.

Here she is spinning...

There is an old, abandoned church off of Mcleod Trail (major North/South road in Calgary) that goes back to the days before the village of Midnapore was swallowed up by the urban sprawl. To say its seen better days is an understatement.

Driving past it one day I noticed that its dilapidated form had been decorated with some new signage. When I looked closer I could make out signs saying "Private Property" and "No Trespassing."

I couldn't help but see the symbolism of it all. No matter how broken down the structures of the church get, we are still primarily worried that the wrong kind of people will get in!! The 'three acres and a steeple' takes precedent over the people that are filling in the condos being built all around it.

Ironically, considering the state of the building, the lawn is well kept - we wouldn't want people to get the wrong idea - 'our Jesus' may be ramshackled and exclusive but he's well manicured where it counts!!

On another note, my daughter has taken to dance anywhere that there is a flat, dry spot - so there were a few action shots taken on this trip (we were originally going out to vist some seniors in our congregation but they were out and about). Unfortunately my wife is the real photographer in our family - but I had her camera with me so I thought I would play with it a bit. I liked this picture for some reason...

It was a good day. The Saturday night set-ups have gone well and they make the Sundays better in every way. We used to have to show up at the school early in the morning and unload everything - originally from vans and cars and then cube vans and finally out of on-site storage. Now there is time to set up, practice the music, get the refreshments ready to go and then turn off the lights and get some sleep.

I have to admit that there are days I would like to own a building that stayed set up all the time - but the cost of real estate is monstrous in Calgary (and getting monstrous-er), and then we would have to worry about mortgages and maintenance, etc. The trade off is not just the lack of set-up, but also the ways we could resource our community. The speed that communities are popping up means that the new ones often lack community centres, meeting space, child care facilities, etc.

Other days it seems appealing to go into a house church model - again removing the need for a weekly set up. This fades as I realize that is the main reason really laziness on my part. Not that I am against this model, I know a few people that doing organic churches and there are lots of upsides. The reason I don't move us into that model is that we get so many people from different backgrounds and the larger meeting space allows us to gather and celebrate our diversity.

Since the beginning of the year we have also been helping out with another church plant.  We always said it would have been nice to have had another church come alongside us and just give us help in areas we were short staffed. Somedays it is hard to rush out from tearing down only to drive across the city for a second go at it - especially since my wife is 5 months pregnant!! But it is what we love doing, the kids have friends there, and the traffic isn't so bad on a Sunday afternoon. 

Ehkosit,

Migwec

This is one night that I really miss living in Saskatchewan. Sadly, its not anything as noble as family, friends or a sense of flatland allegience. The reality is I just hate getting up an hour earlier than usual. Not just because I possess a grumpiness::early morning factor, but with three kids it makes the morning unbearable - especially since our Sunday mornings are a little nuts at the best of times.  

Just getting some final marking finished up at my office (actually its somebody else's but in the evenings I teach I come in early and pretend its mine). I have always had a strange fondness of offices - everywhere else I've always been the fat funny guy, but in my office (surrounded by my books) I am erudite and learned (make sure you pronounce that as 'lurNED') - I am that academic that I thought I was going to be. Once I leave the office I revert back (I often sing show tunes in my linguistics classes and quote Woody Allen as often as Noam Chomsky) but in my office I am thoroughly bookish (my wife says I am even pretentious).

Leaving my big office at the downtown church (complete with eight floor to (almost) ceiling bookshelves) was one of the hardest transitions to make in the whole churchplanting endevour (even when I was only going down after hours and on Saturdays).

Its been nice to get the linguistics and TESOL books out of the boxes and onto some shelves - it was like unpacking a bit of my soul and restoring it to its rightful place!!

Ehkosit,

Migwec.

Our Wednesday night children's ministry was cancelled tonight due to a drama team going to the school we rent. I thought I would stop by to (1) make sure there weren't any stranded "Club DJ" kids and (2) be a part of the activity (I volunteer at the school so I figured I could sneak into the back without being seen as a creepy old guy). But when I arrived the parking lot was empty and the school was dark...there was nothing going on. I know that there are frustrations in owning a building - but renting a neutral space isn't the stress-less, joy-filled solution some people (authors, church planting pundits, etc) tout it to be.

Oh well I have a little time to grab a coffee and collect my thoughts before I head out to a few visits. I thought about going home but my brood is used to having Wednesday as a high energy gym night and they have been bouncing off the walls since they got home from school today.

Over the next while I want to work/talk/pray with some folks in the know (and in the thick of things) to help me go from 'church-ranting' to 'church planting.' I am not a complainer by nature, but I have become fairly cynical and borderline negative over the last few years. I love the denomination I serve in, but it has been a while since we have had a full on focus with our church-planting initiatives. Now that there is a significant amount of church plants starting up - e.g., Calgary was dormant (for us) for 30 years and now there are three very different church plants in the city. In good baptistic fashion this will need to be done at a grass roots level and work its way up.

Ehkosit,

Migwec

test

this just a test

Its Tuesday morning and the women's small group is going on. That means I need to put down my concordances, interlinear greek new testament and put on my childminding cap. I think its one of the reasons I enjoy pastoring a small church - my ADDesque vocational attention span comes in handy. On any given day I shift from youth worker to counselor to CEO to scholar.

Well the group is ending so I need to clean up toys...

ehkosit

Migwec

Zoiks! I'm tired. I usually take it slow on Mondays - but it's beautiful out and so I am going to take the dog out to the dog wash. I also have to take in the recycling in (its been a while and it is starting to really back up) and find a few doodads in the garage - an old router, a composite hockey blade, a few textbooks on Applied Linguistics. I'm not building some McGiver (sp?) device I just have had a lot of little jobs to do and I want to catch up on them this week while the weather is nice.

Today was an exceptional day. I have been meeting people non-stop for the last two-weeks (maybe longer) mostly leading up to our congregational meeting. The phrase "Annual Church Meeting" is often the strongest cussin' in a pastor's vocabulary (it's often what I say when I hit my fingers with a hammer for example). I have never felt that way about SouthGate meetings - but as we have grown we have taken on bigger decisions - e.g., are we ready for independence? Is this budget do-able? Who is a member? etc. 

One of the big things we were discussing was our budget. This was the first year we developed our own budget. That is a great step forward - but we had to do it without any actual financial records from our accounting service. Needless to say this caused me more than a little frustration and worry (and insomnia). But because we did our homework and our congregation understands some of the struggles we have had with our mother church (more like a crack-mother church at times) they endorsed the budget and other business.

It has been good to watch people step into leadership roles - and this was so apparent from the involvement of people in the meeting.

ehkosit

migwec

Still plugging away at Jane Eyre - but should finish it soon. 

Had a good meeting with our leadership team. We are getting ready for a baptismal service this Sunday  and an annual meeting the next Sunday. It is pretty busy for us - but it is a healthy busy. 

Lots of new things happening - we are changing up our leadership structure and our relationship with our sponsoring church is changing as well.

Some of the changes have me a little anxious, but all in all it is heading in a right direction for everybody involved.

Ehkosit

Migwec

I just finished re-taping hockey sticks and lighting a fire. It marks the end of a good Family Day Weekend. Over the weekend we were able to play pond hockey, road hockey and NHL 06 on the gamecube (I think I lost in all of the venues).  We ate well - pancakes, pizza, deer sausage, etc. We spent time reading - different books but same room (I am so happy that my kids are book worms as well). Mason and Micah are both reading at levels several grades ahead of their current standing.

We enjoyed a good time at church - several new families, others we haven't seen for awhile, and plenty of regulars. This has historically been the lowest attendance Sunday and so it was encouraging to see those people. We have come through a difficult stretch - I wouldn't want to repeat the last 4 months anytime soon (or any time at all). But it has strengthened the resolve of our congregation and it resulted in a others really stepping up.

Ehkosit

Migwec

I am currently trying to finish Jane Eyre. Not only because its a worthwhile endeavor, but because my wife is an expert on this genre of literature. She finished up her degree focussing on English Literature from the Raj (when England ruled India) and British Female Writers of the 1800s (e.g., the Bronte sisters and Jane Austen). 

Its not that I don't read - I tear through an enormous amount of books but seldom fiction - mostly a variety of leadership, business and theology books - with a healthy dose of theoretical and applied linguistcs textbooks. All fairly dry. I find it is difficult to read literature since I finished out my Masters and started in on a doctorate.

My plan is to finish it by the end of Family Day weekend (as sort of a belated Valentine's Day gift).

If this works out I may try to restart (for the umpteenth time) and finally finish Burmese Days- the only book I have started and shelved more times than Jane Eyre!!!

Ehkosit,

Migwec 

Trust is an interesting thing. We need to be able to trust the people we work with - especially in non-profits where we don't have financial incentives and bonuses acting as a organizational motivator and as a salve in teams. 

Trust becomes the only thing we have - do we really have each others back - as we pursue a common goal. I'm struggling with this because I have been burned too many times due to my 'trust  first' inclinations. I feel like I have not only let the fox in the hen house, but I have let Robert Picton in the Chicken ranch (if you remember the Dolly Parton movie about the best chicken ranch in Texas)!! Its not just that people get hurt or we miss our opportunities, it becomes a situation where people are destroyed - and most often its the people on the periphery.

I've also come to realize the people that talk the most about trust are like the church that claims on its sign to be "the friendliest church in town" or the car dealership that is called "Honest ____'s Autos." If you have to tell me you are something it must mean you ain't! I think that the next time someone tells me that "all we have in this relationship is our trust" I will choose to not remain too dependent on that relationship - cuz its gonna come off the tracks sometime anyhoo.

ehkosit,

migwec 

It was a day where I was confronted head on with the growth in Calgary. For the most part I spend my days in our li'l section of the city. However, today I had meetings downtown with our denomination and then had to go over to another church to check out their baptistry (we are having a couple of baptismal services in February and May). 

What took me about 25-30 minutes when I first moved to Calgary took me more than 1 and a 1/2 hours!! Certainly a few accidents and a water main breaking forced a lot of the northbound traffic onto McLeod Trail - but it was still a long time to sit in my car. 

Meetings were good. We are looking forward to some of the transitions that are planned for the new year and especially the number of people coming forward for baptism!!

Ehkosit!

Migwec

Well I finally made the decision to switch over from PC to Mac. I had a hideous fall where I had to reload my entire laptop no less than 5 times. Besides just figuring out some of the basic differences between the two (short cuts, etc) I now have the difficult task of choosing to refer to my self as a Mac Daddy (as Chris Kelly did) or a Daddy Mac (as Chris Smith did).  At any rate I will be putting my pants on backwards in the morning!!

On a side note I score approximately 3.8 times higher on the cool chart than I did yesterday, I have cravings for strangely named coffees and I feel six years younger!!

Just when you think a chapter in your life is finished it seems to repeat itself - as if the writers' strike is throwing life itself into reruns. I have had two such realizations of this in the last couple of weeks. One is that my wife and I will be back into diapers and sleepless nights again (come this summer) when we have another baby. The other is that I will remain in pastoral ministry in Calgary.

Both come with incredible joy and challenge attached to them. I love being a Dad. I also love being a pastor. Up until this afternoon I was sure that I would go through 2008 carrying only one of those titles.

In a spirit of positivity I will not get into why I thought this, but I was more than certain that I needed to rethink my vocational calling - I even watched as some unexpected and unsolicited job offers came in.

But my heart is in serving as a church planter and so I am glad to remain where I am - though one opportunity would have involved a family membership at a golf & country club and that is a little hard to just forget even in the middle of January :-).

Migwec

Christmas is a time when we celebratem (among other things) a pregnant couple that endured horrific sleeping conditions. As an homage to that theme my wife -who is expecting our fourth child in July - and I slept on an air mattress for the last week. Now we didn't have any cattle or sheep sharing our accomodation, but we did have our other kids migrate individually throughout the night into our 'stall.' Sandwich that between two 8 hour drives (with only one hour of Veggie Tales audio plays repeated to fill those eight hours) and you have a glimpse at why I may mnore closely resemble the Grinch than any other Yule time character.

We managed to arrive back in Calgary early enought that the kids could pull out their toys, games etc. for a bit before bed.

The other exciting news is that we have brought my Dad back with us for a visit. He celebrated his 65th birthday on Thursday (which was also our 13th anniversary). We gave him an all expenses paid vacation - the only catch is its at our house. The kids have lots of plans for hockey, the zoo, hockey, playing with the dog, hockey and possibly some hockey.

After a few years of only doing guest lectures at different colleges I am back in the academic saddle!! I am set to teach a few classes at a local college and maybe be involved with starting something new at one of the universities in town. It is nice to get involved in this aspect of life again. SouthGate is at a place where my teaching is okay and may even be a healthy thing as it will leave some space for people to move into.

I have always connected with the story of Eric Liddell - my own grandfather spent time in an "international Settlement" in China (the term for prison camps). One of the greatest lines in Chariots of Fire (the movie about Liddell's life) is "I believe God made me for a purpose--for China. But He also made me fast! And when I run, I feel His pleasure." I feel the same way. I feel that God has created me (and joined me with my wife who shares the calling) to be a church planter; but God also made me a teacher and when I enter into discussions of 'allophonic environments' or 'first language interference' I truly feel God's pleasure (most other people just feel a little drowsy).

On an entirely unrelated note on Monday night my daughter was dancing like a princess until she dropped like a rock and hit her head (not all princesses are graceful I guess). The end result was 6 hours at the "urgent care" facility and four stitches. I don't mean to slag the people working there - I know its not their fault - but I think that the term 'urgent care' is destined to join 'jumbo shrimp' 'military intelligence' and 'government organization' as an example of oxymorons. There was nothing particularly 'urgent' or 'caring' in the servicing of a three year old with a facial laceration (and she's a princess to boot).

Just got back from a double-header evening. In the first part of the evening I went out with the youth from our church - there were 7 of us in total. We shot each other up at Laser Trek cuz nuthin says Christmas like opening fire on each other in a poorly lit warehouse!! Good times.

Then I went to house party where we had a chance to eat all of the stuff that is verbotten on the Core Plan diet I promised my wife I would join her on (she has since stopped but I guess I am still s'posed to stay on it for the both of us). We laughed a lot and sang some Christmas carols - often with a Jamaican lilt as many of them were on the Boney M Christmas Album.

It was so good to remember why I do this church thing - because there is a sense of community that is growing at SouthGate and it transcends cultures and ages because it is built on the Good News that also transcends cultures and ages.

Things are good - I am going to go to sleep now.

It is funny to me that a blog that started out as a travelogue to keep friends and family up to date with a trip to China has turned into a venting space for a disillusioned (but still 'called') pastor. It's kinda become a travelogue through the hills and valleys of church-planting.

Sure I recognize that I have brought a lot of this on me. Less stubborn people would have been more open to suggestions and smarter people would have left years ago - but I am not those people and so - as I was told in a meeting recently - this is the price I pay for planting when and where I did.

Had one of those meetings yesterday that seem okay at the time but had a delayed release - like time-release tylenol or rancid pulgogi. As the day continued I realised that it was really a terrible meeting and that my character had been impugned time and again. Maybe I am just losing it, but to quote that great philosopher Steve Earle "Just cuz you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you!!"

I often construct soundtracks to my life. Earlier this week (leading up to the meeting) it featured the Clash's "Should I stay or Should I Go" but following the meeting I have found myself humming Nirvana's "Rape Me Again." Maybe that's my problem - I should construct my mood music from DiGarmo & Keyes or Carman rathering than angst ridden rockers - but truth betold I feel more akin to the former than the latter.

So I break out my ascerbic pen. This is not how we would solve things back on the Rez!! Anyhoo this doodle is the fruit of my furor.

On a side note I don't mind a good scrap and so I am staying - but I will ruthlessly fight the efforts to squeeze SouthGate into one more mono-ethnic White church mold - with an appropriate sprinkling of ethnic colouring to fight off any accusations of racism or elitism - no matter what trendy tag we add to it.

The next six months could be the roughest of our entire ministry - mostly because I refuse to let absentee landlords to try impose their agenda on a community that has done quite well without their support or encouragement.