Quantitative Research

One of the differences between many European and North American doctoral programs is the need to take a suite of courses - some of which may be outside of your research focus. By training and experience I am a qualitative researcher - my work in linguistics and anthropology have focused on communities and interviews. This semester I am being stretched/challenged by taking a required course in quantitative research methodology. I know it will make me a more rounded researcher, but it is a struggle in places.

If nothing else it has inspired a couple of pictures - one that features SPSS (the software we are using) as onomatopoeia and the other chronicling my transition into a Tolkienian gollum ....

Migwec,
Ehkosit!

Spent the last two weeks feeling completely overwhelmed - that's a word that gets used too often, but I think it is the best word for the experience. It started when I got sick. Usually I can just keep going (with a fair bit of whining) and power my way through a sickness but this time I was in bed for two days - I even missed a hockey game.It was then that I realized how little margin there is in my time. I have spent the last two weeks trying to pick up the dropped balls in all areas of my life. That put me behind in reading and writing assignments for my PhD classes.I had a hard time getting everything done for church. I made a promise that I wouldn't carve time out from my family to do my studies and it was very tempting to go back on this promise. They are the easiest people to rob time from - but they are also the most important and so I fought the urge, handed in some papers late and kept playing catch-up.

For the first time in a long time I felt good about my productivity yesterday. I locked myself in the home office and plowed through several articles and finished off a couple more papers. Part of my problem is that I forget about time when I am interacting with the material I am studying. Much like a jogger who loses track of the miles when 'runner's high' kicks in, I can literally have the day evaporate when I get immersed in a text (sort of a 'reader's high'). Lately I have been totally geeked on the post-structuralist writings of Bonnie Norton (who I saw at TESL 2009), Homi Bhabha, Claire Kramsch, etc. Of particular interest is their (re)conceptualization of identity and the creation of a third place when cultures intersect.

In another class I have been reading Chinese philosophers Suntze (The Art of War) and Laotze (The Tao Te Ching) and waxing elequently on their advice to leaders. I have read The Tao Te Ching before, but I was younger and didn't get it. I decided to come back to it when I was older and had a better shot at understanding it. Well, I didn't get it at 15 and I am still fuzzy at 39 so I guess I will try again at 55 or so. One of Laotze's big things is this idea of Wei Wu Wei (action without action) or just letting stuff take its own course. I was thinking about it this last week in how it might connect with modern living and one of the guys on my hockey team gave me a great illustration of it (although to be honest he never actually referred to it as "an exemplar manifestation of the Taoist concept of "wei wu wei"). We won our game and so everybody was a little chattier in the dressing room afterwords and talked about the pucks that went in and the numerous near misses. That's when John said "The problem with the last chance was I had too much time to think about it...if I would've just shot it I would have scored. I always play better when I just play and don't think about it" I was about to point out how that lines up with the Tao Te Ching's teaching, but decided to just keep unlacing my skates. It would've been another case of 'too much thinking.'

Migwec,
Ehkosit.

It is all lining up...

Since September I have been trying to figure out how to make everything fall into alignment - how do I make my PhD bring benefit to (1) my work as a pastor, (2) my background in linguistics and TESOL and (3) introduce an original contribution to the academy.

On Oct 2 I ran out to the TESL Canada Conference because it was in my backyard (well technically in Banff but I have a pretty big backyard). The keynote for the day was Dr. Bonnie Norton. She presented on Identity and Language Learning. It was amazing! She was answering questions I was trying to formulate on multiculturalism and the multiple identities L2 learners hold. One of the thinkers she referenced was Homi Bhabha from Harvard. I have spent the week working through articles from Norton and Bhabha. Both authors talk a lot about the Third Space that gets created when cultures come together - in a society (Bhabha), in a classroom (Norton), or in church (c'est moi).

I finally have a sense of what my research will look like. I want to look at the way that we 'translate culture' in a third place context such as a ethnically diverse congregation. The leadership question is how we architect this third place so we don't default to the hiving tendencies of multiculturalism which can create as much ethnocentrism as it dispels (kinda like a fridge creates cold but puts off a lot of heat to do so). I will look at the role of the teacher/pastor in this as well as the unique people that will 'sign on' for this kind of community. One of the benefits of studying at Eastern is that they have a number of top notch scholar/practitioners. Among them is Dr HeeWon Chang (she has done a lot of work on autoethnography in education) and I am looking forward to studying with her in the next on-site as she brings a strong anthro background into the mix. As I dig up more resources I will post on them. I am genuinely, academically, ecclesiologically excited about this research!!

A Crash Course in Community

Over the next four years a large part of my life (and therefore blog entries) will be marked by my pursuit of a PhD at Eastern University in Philadelphia.

The PhD program I am a part of is very interdisciplinary in nature. It involves students in three tracks: 1) Business, 2) Education and 3) Non-Profit. But from the word 'go' those three are mixed together. I am glad that I have had experience in all three because it would be quite daunting otherwise - it seems everybody is a heavy hitter in one of those those tracks (e.g., directors of programs at Ivy League institutions and addictions centres, leaders in major relief organizations, senior management in large corporations, etc.) . Not only are there people from different backgrounds but there is a geographic diversity as well. The cohort brings together people from all over the place - Left Coast, Right Coast, Africa, South America, and a growing number of Canucks (Eastern may need to consider starting a Ice Hockey Team). And in a field that will require us to study the impact of the Glass Ceiling, my cohort group has more women than men.

What is even more amazing than our differences is they way we have been able to connect with one another. Up until this week we were names on email headers - I didn't know anything about them, nor they about me. Before we travelled to Philadelphia we received a booklet that gave a little bio and picture of our fellow cohorters (cohortees ...cohortians...??) but I still had no idea what to expect. It did not take long to develop a sense of community within our group. Some people stepped up to make sure logistics were taken care of. Others became gatekeepers in online and in class discussions to make sure people were heard from. The locals made sure we all got the skinny on where to get the best Philly Cheese Steaks (whether locally or in historic Philadelphia) and have started to get a line on 76ers tickets (possibly even Eagles tickets for next Sept). There is a shared sense of mission in our midst - its not just about individuals achieving their goals - it is about the whole cohort graduating and being PHinisheD.

I have to admit that was a new experience for me. Most of my adult life I have been around doctoral students - my dad was a professor, I spent time in research-heavy degree at the honours and graduate levels. Doctoral students are a competitive lot - you don't get there without being determined and focused. There is certainly a comraderie in their ranks - but there is also a scarcity mentality that says there is only so much pie - resources like profs' time, research funding, TA positions, etc. - and the more pieces it is cut into means that there is less for me!! At times it can be quite cut-throat.

Although it is early into this journey it seems that this won't be experience at Eastern. We spent one afternoon in our interdisciplinary groups sharing research interests and how they could relate to Leadership Studies (and ultimately our dissertations). Nobody hogged the conch - everybody shared ideas from their backgrounds, suggested different angles to pursue or other resources to explore so that we all had the benefit from the diverse expertise around us.

My church's tagline is "A place to Belong, Believe and Become." We see these as the ways that we create true Christian Community (not just a buzz-word version of it). This is what my week in Phillie felt like. There is a long way to go but it is great to now I won't be journeying alone - I have my cohort, my church and my family with me. In an initiative as solitary as a PhD it is comforting to have this growing sense of community around me!

Migwec,
Ehkosit.

Not such a great start...

I got to the airport in good time, but when I tried to get checked in they told me that my suitcase was too heavy. This means I have to unpack it and transfer some books into my carry-on. The reason I had them in my checked luggage is that they are stinking heavy. As I do this I can feel the Superman stares of the other passengers waiting in line behind me...at this point the Air Canada representative announces that she's going to go on her break as it looks like it will take me awhile to get my stuff all together (I feel the stares intensify into something more like the laser blasts from Cyclops than xray vision from Clark Kent).

I hobble off to the boarding gate like a hobbit on laundry day - an odd assortment of socks books and various sundry spilling out of my computer bags. I catch the attentive eye of the Security staff and I know this is not going to be a laid back start to my trip. At 5am I look like a crazed terrorist in general - but now I am definitely marked as a person of interest. The guard makes me take off my shoes and belt (and manages to break the button on my jeans in the process). I think everything will be fine once I get to my plane - but I am wrong. Nothing is in its proper spot - I can't find my earphones, the book and notepad are no longer together and I can't find where I re-stuffed my pens. I feel a familiar warming of my neck as the passengers I held up at the check and security gate are now waiting for me to solve the case study in chaos theory that is my carry-on luggage!

Things seem to settle down as we start the first leg of the journey. However once we get to cruising altitude the guy beside me pulls out the newspaper and starts to read it. But not in the "I'm on an airplane so I should confine myself to the small amount of space represented by my seats footprint" manner - no he decides to stretch out and read like he is at home and has picked this week to be the time he has decided to take the William Shatner / All-Bran Challenge. In synchronised swimming precision the person in front decides to adjust his seat into full recline mode. He only stops when the chair cannot go any further back without driving my knees into the cargo hold (but he takes a few runs at it before being sure this is the case).

I decide to resign myself to the discomfort - but I am not making this journey alone and decide to take these two travelers along with me. I move the magazines and drive one knee into Capt Lazy Boys kidney (if I am going to lose the feeling in my legs I decide to make him pee blood for the rest of the week). I also decide to claim my fair share of the arm rest so that Bowel Buddy can't get his arms into a comfortable 90-degree angle.

UPDATE: In a touching homage to Patrick Swazey's passing the guy in front of me has managed to pass my guard and has me in a position where I am straddling him...if he starts to throw a pot (a la Ghost) on his drop down tray I may need to strangle him with the dorky vest he is wearing - or at least stare at his neck until he feels my disapproval.

Oh Well we can only go up from here!

Migwec,
Ehkosit.

new heights of Nerd-ines

Return of the N.E.R.D. pt II

As a part of my PhD there are three site visits to Eastern University. Beyond those three weeks I also have a number of "Synchronous" and "Asynchronous" online classes...also known as "Webinars." In preparation for these I have had to dig out my old webcam and throw on a microphone headset. Yikes it is too Geekalicious for ya babee...

Its neat to have the classroom interaction and dialogue but since these will be the first images I have of everybody in my cohort I am afraid I won't recognize them without dorky headsets on - I may pack my to wear around the hotel just in case.

Every time I see myself up on my computer screen I think I look like an aging version of that youtube kid singing that stupid Numa Numa song.